#WTF: Twitter Takes Over the Romance Novel

I like my romance novels firmly rooted in fantasy. Faraway places, lurid physically impossible sex scenes, and guys who, like, talk about their feelings and junk! That’s why Teresa Medeiros’s newest romance novel, Goodnight Tweetheart, hit a little too close to reality.

That’s right. A romance revolving around twitter. OMG! WTF! LOL!

The book starts with “former literary sensation Abby Donovan” as she tries out Twitter for the first time (does that make her a twirgin?). Through the wonder of the internetz she meets Mark Baynard, “a man who uses both humor and imagination to hide a secret that could change both their lives forever.”

What follows is six pages of tweets. I’m not kidding. Here’s a snippet:

MarkBaynard: R U a Twitter virgin?
Abby Donovan:This is my first time. But you’re not being very gentle with me.”
MarkBaynard: What can I say? I like it rough. So how did you end up here? Attention span too short for Facebook?
AbbyDonovan: I didn’t like the answers to those silly Facebook quizzes. They kept telling me I was the lovechild of Lisa Simpson and Marilyn Manson.

Scintillating! Sorry, but there is nothing romantic or alluring about Twitter. We’re talking about a place that considers Justin Bieber a trending topic.

Regardless of what Abby thinks, a relationship based in Facebook would be totes more romantic. They’d friend each other. Profile pictures would be scrutinized. Poking would lead to poking. They’d buy a nice piece of acreage on Farmville to raise a family. And finally, they’d change their relationship status.

As much as eHarmony insists that 1 in 5 relationships starts from an online dating site. I prefer my hero and heroine to meet the old-fashioned way. She’s a shy but beautiful heiress. He’s a dashing Scottish laird. He kidnaps her out of revenge and hatred for her family.

But if you must read it (who are we kidding, I’ll probably pick up a copy), Goodnight Tweethearts comes out January 2011. Pre-order it! Quick!

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About The Countess

A strong-willed harlot that enjoys reading romance novel, sipping port, and gallivanting with the brawny stable boy (scandalous!).
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